Wedding Officiant

Wedding Officiant, Wedding Pastor, Wedding Minister is Available for Wedding Ceremonies

Wedding Officiant, Wedding Pastor, Wedding Minister

Why Choose A Religious Ceremony?

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Why choose a religious ceremony? This couple both attended church when they were children, one a Protestant and the other a Catholic.  It was important to them to have a religious ceremony that reflected their beliefs about marriage.  Therefore,  the ceremony included traditional elements that they were both familiar with:  prayer, scripture, homily, vows, exchange of rings,  music, and a blessing.  They also choose to have the ceremony in a church because of their beliefs.

Non-traditional elements that were included: unity candle, a blessing by both families and a symbolic “locking” at the end of the ceremony.    In the photo, notice that I am holding a padlock with no key.  Two silver initials representing each person, were slid on the open, keyless padlock, and then closed.  Their lives were forever “locked together” through marriage and commitment. The padlock was then given to the couple as a reminder of that day.

When you are preparing for your marriage, ask yourselves:  do I believe God is a part of marriage,  does Christ help me practice forgiveness,  does my faith inform me how to be a better spouse?  Do I believe it will make a difference having God’s blessing in the ceremony?   If your answers are yes, you might consider having a religious ceremony.

If you have any questions, or would like to discuss my availability, qualifications or experience,  see (About),  or please send email to Joy .

Outdoor Wedding

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Outdoor Wedding Site

Arbor Gardens, Moore Oklahoma

The Oklahoma City area has many options for outdoor wedding ceremonies.  The newest venue in 2014  is  Arbor Gardens in Moore.  Arbor Gardens has a gazebo type structure overlooking a pond,  sidewalks wind from the parking area to the gazebo and throughout the wooded 10 acres.  The gazebo will hold close to 30 seated guests.  There are several bridges to cross, creating numerous photo opportunities.

There are plans for the park in the near future to become an arboretum.   A large variety of plants have yet to be installed.  In the meantime, most of the construction appears to be done.  Restrooms were added near the parking area last fall.

Rental of the park is a minimum cost of $15.  per hour for nonresidents of Moore.   Residents can reserve for 2 free hours.

Where:  Exit 19th st sw off I-35.  turn south/left on Telephone Rd.  Go 1 mile.  Turn right/west at stop sign,  watch for Arbor Garden on your right, about a half mile.

Last Minute Wedding

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Are you quickly making arrangements for a last minute wedding?   I don’t usually encourage a “spur of the moment” wedding.  However, there are circumstances that arise in life that may justify getting married sooner rather than later.  If you have just found out that you or your partner are being deployed overseas, or a parent is dying, or your partner is terminally ill, you may be considering a last minute wedding.

The main concerns that I have about quick weddings are these:  have both parties given some previous thought to getting married,  or is this an impulsive decision?   Are both of you convinced that you are compatible and have some interests in common?  Have you known each other long enough (at least 12-18 months) to know the true personality of the other, their temperament,  their spending habits, addictions, spare time activities?   There is nothing wrong with a last minute wedding as long as the two of you have done your homework on each other and know what you are getting into.

Dr. Barton Goldsmith, has written a helpful article in Psychology Today titled,  “How Long Does It Take To Get to Know Someone?”    Dr. Goldsmith’s point is:  do your homework.   You can never ask your partner too many questions. If you are rushing the relationship,  you don’t’ have a chance to measure over time if his/her “walk matches the talk.”  Getting to know the “real person”  takes time!

Getting married quickly should not be a decision that is made in the heat of passion when your brain is not in gear.   The heat of passion often fades  around 18-24 months.   If you want a long term marriage, it is important to have similar values and common interests  to sustain your relationship when the passion tank is nearly empty.  The good news is, those shared goals and activities often ignite the old flames of passion and keep the fires burning.

If you’ve done your homework, and you think you’ve found the right person,  make the commitment and get married!  Life is richer with someone to share it.

For a last minute wedding, Send Email to Joy ,  a Wedding Officiant in the Oklahoma City area.  See About

Getting Married in Cleveland County, Oklahoma

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To obtain a marriage license, both the man and the woman applying for the marriage license must be unmarried and at least 18 years old. Both applicants should be able to show a valid form of photo I.D. when they go to submit the marriage license application at the Cleveland County Court Clerk’s office. There are no residency requirements for marriage license applicants in the state of Oklahoma.

Can a minor be issued a marriage license in Cleveland County?
Yes, but there are additional requirements for minor applicants. Minors that are 16 or 17 years old must have parental consent to be issued a marriage license. Minors that are 15 years old must have parental consent and a court order to apply for a marriage license.

Can a person be issued a marriage license in Cleveland County if he or she has been married previously?
Yes, but if an applicant has been recently divorced, he or she must wait until the divorce has been final for 6 months before the Cleveland County Court Clerk’s office can issue a new marriage license.

How long is the waiting period for marriage licenses in Cleveland County, Oklahoma?
There is no waiting period for most marriage licenses in Cleveland County. Marriage licenses issued to minor applicants have a 72 hour waiting period. Marriage licenses are issued on the spot at the Cleveland County Courthouse. Marriage licenses issued in Cleveland County are valid anywhere in the state of Oklahoma.

Does an engaged couple need blood tests to apply for a marriage license in Cleveland County, Oklahoma?
No, blood tests are not required as part of the marriage license application in Cleveland County, Oklahoma.

How much is a marriage license in Cleveland County?
A marriage license in Cleveland County costs $50.00. This fee must be paid in full at the Cleveland County Court Clerk’s office. Couples can qualify for a reduced marriage license fee if they complete pre-marital counseling.

Who is authorized to perform marriage ceremonies in Cleveland County, Oklahoma?
Ordained members of religious clergy and active and retired judges are among those that are authorized to perform marriage ceremonies in Cleveland County, Oklahoma.  Send Email to Joy to officiate your wedding.  Joy is a retired pastor living in Cleveland County.

How can a couple obtain a marriage certificate in Cleveland County, Oklahoma?
After the marriage ceremony, couples can order certified copies of the marriage certificate from the Cleveland County Court Clerk’s office. Couples should contact the Cleveland County Court Clerk’s office to learn more about ordering copies or certified copies of their marriage certificate.

All of the above information should be verified for accuracy with the Cleveland County Court Clerk’s office,  located in the Cleveland County Courthouse, located at 200 South Peters, Norman, Oklahoma.  The Cleveland County Court Clerk’s office can be reached by phone at (405) 321-6402

Getting Married in Oklahoma

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To get married in Oklahoma:  visit your county clerk or the county’s website to find out the marriage requirements.

Confirm the following:

1. What valid form of photo ID is required?  Do both of you need to bring proof of age, a birth certificate, driver’s license or passport?

2.  Does a minor need a parent’s consent to get married?

3.  Are there residency requirements for applicants in the state of Oklahoma?

4. There will be a license fee that you will need to pay to the Clerk of Court.   How much?
The license has a expiration date. Be sure you secure a wedding officiant for a particular date before applying for the license.  send email to Joy for her availability.  She is located in the OKC area.

5.  Is there a waiting period after applying for the marriage license?  There may be a different waiting period depending on one’s age.

6.  Are blood tests required?

7.   Is there a waiting period if I have been recently divorced?

You may have more questions of your own, write them down and have your list handy when you talk with the Clerk’s office.

Why is a Wedding Officiant Important?

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The wedding officiant sets the tone for your ceremony, so choose wisely.

(1) What kind of speaking voice does she or he have? It’s surprising that a number of officiants can’t be heard in a group setting. Find out if the officiant is soft spoken or projects their voice when speaking to a group. Rent a microphone system or find a louder officiant. Imagine this, “I am sure it was a nice ceremony, but none of us could hear what was being said!”

(2) Does the officiant have training and experience? Most brides and grooms become nervous at some point. If you have an officiant who is visibly nervous, it adds fuel to the fire. Most of us have seen someone stand up to speak and their hands and notes are shaking like a leaf. It makes everyone nervous for them and it’s hard to enjoy the moment. Does the officiant encourage confidence and calm?

(3) What does the officiant believe is the purpose of a wedding ceremony? What makes it extraordinary from other events in our lives?

My perspective is this: if it’s a religious ceremony, it is a worship service. Granted, it can be more or less formal or informal, but it has a sense of sacredness and joy. God blesses those who love each other and promise to be faithful. Christians believe that Christ is present in their marriage, offering forgiveness when mistakes are made and the grace to begin again. Love is a commitment, not a feeling.

If it’s a civil ceremony, it is a ritual through which two people can proclaim their love for and faithfulness to each other. This ceremony usually has no religious references or mention of God and is often performed by a government official, minister or justice of the peace. Depending on where the civil ceremony is held, you can often include favorite poetry readings and musical selections.

Occasionally I am asked, if a civil ceremony has no reference to God, why are you as a pastor willing to do a nonreligious ceremony? The state legally gives pastors and ministers this responsibility. I accept that not everyone believes as I do. Therefore, it is important to acknowledge the commitment between two individuals who wish to proclaim their love thru a nonreligious ceremony.

Summary: Your wedding officiant sets the tone of your wedding ceremony. You will want it to have a sense of dignity and joy. Many pastors who have been educated and trained in ministry, have been thru a lengthy approval process that is required before he or she is ordained. Proceed cautiously with those who are self proclaimed ministers or who have received their ordination online. They have not been through an approval process like mentioned above and not all states recognize the online ordination. Choose your officiant wisely.

To check on my availability: send email to Joy or fill out the Contact Form.

What is a Wedding Officiant?

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Depending on your state, a wedding officiant can be a pastor, minister, priest, or a government official such as a judge. Research the specifics of your state on their website. It will tell you who legally can perform your marriage ceremony.

Depending on the wedding officiant, he or she will likely meet with you to see what kind of ceremony you have in mind and if the three of you are a good match. You should be interviewing the officiant at the same time.

Your wedding officiant is the one in charge of the ceremony and rehearsal. Be clear about this. If it is important to you, you will have a chance to give input and preference to the type of ceremony, readings, songs, vows, the processional and recessional.  You should have communicated and discussed your preferences with the officiant prior to the rehearsal and wedding. The officiant should know ahead of time, where your family is to be seated and in what order, who is walking in with whom in the wedding party, how they should stand, how they should walk in and out, etc. This information is important to the one in charge.

When it comes time for the rehearsal or wedding, the officiant gets the ball rolling. If you are thinking of asking a family member to be your officiant, make sure they are a “take charge” person, or things will become chaotic quickly. This person needs to be aware of all the details and what to do, ahead of time. It is not really fair for a family member to know how to do this unless they have been trained by someone. An experienced officiant would be the wisest choice.

If you or a family member have issues with control, you must be clear. THE OFFICIANT IS IN CHARGE! You do not want a power struggle in front of the wedding party or guests. The rehearsal is a practice time, not the time to start making new decisions or changing how to do things. The exception might be if something unexpected arises that no one was aware of. An experienced officiant usually plans for these things ahead of time so that the rehearsal goes smoothly and so goes the wedding.

In summary: the wedding officiant not only performs the ceremony, but is in charge of directing the wedding party on the who, what, when, hows of the rehearsal and ceremony.
It is best if your officiant is experienced not only in large group speaking, but directing a group of people as well. It is much more enjoyable for all if the rehearsal and wedding is an orderly experience.

To check my schedule and availability for your wedding date, please Send Email to Joy or fill out the Contact Form.

Who can be a Wedding Officiant in Oklahoma?

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The Oklahoma Statues Title 43 tell us who may be a wedding officiant in Oklahoma.

A. All marriages must be contracted by a formal ceremony performed or solemnized in the presence of at least two adult, competent persons as witnesses, by a judge or retired judge of any court in this state, or an ordained or authorized preacher or minister of the Gospel, priest or other ecclesiastical dignitary of any denomination who has been duly ordained or authorized by the church to which he or she belongs to preach the Gospel, or a rabbi and who is at least eighteen (18) years of age.

B. 1. The judge shall place his or her order of appointment on file with the office of the court clerk of the county in which he or she resides.

2. The preacher, minister, priest, rabbi, or ecclesiastical dignitary who is a resident of this state shall have filed, in the office of the court clerk of the county in which he or she resides, a copy of the credentials or authority from his or her church or synagogue authorizing him or her to solemnize marriages.

3. The preacher, minister, priest, rabbi, or ecclesiastical dignitary who is not a resident of this state, but has complied with the laws of the state of which he or she is a resident, shall have filed once, in the office of the court clerk of the county in which he or she intends to perform or solemnize a marriage, a copy of the credentials or authority from his or her church or synagogue authorizing him or her to solemnize marriages.

4. The filing by resident or nonresident preachers, ministers, priests, rabbis, ecclesiastical dignitaries or judges shall be effective in and for all counties of this state; provided, no fee shall be charged for such recording.

C. No person herein authorized to perform or solemnize a marriage ceremony shall do so unless the license issued therefor be first delivered into his or her possession nor unless he or she has good reason to believe the persons presenting themselves before him or her for marriage are the identical persons named in the license, and for whose marriage the same was issued, and that there is no legal objection or impediment to such marriage.

D. Marriages between persons belonging to the society called Friends, or Quakers, the spiritual assembly of the Baha’is, or the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, which have no ordained minister, may be solemnized by the persons and in the manner prescribed by and practiced in any such society, church, or assembly.

The above information is taken from the Oklahoma Statues Title 43 Marriage http://www.oscn.net/applications/oscn/DeliverDocument.asp?CiteID=71793

Choosing a Wedding Officiant

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A Celebration of Marriage

When choosing a wedding officiant,  there are a number of things to consider.

(1)  What is the officiant’s background and training?  As one who has a Masters degree, 4 years of graduate training beyond a college degree,  I find it a little disturbing that individuals can sign up on a website and receive their “ordination” in a matter of minutes.   Would you hire a plumber, mechanic, teacher or dentist, if they got their “papers” online in a matter of minutes?

(2)  What is the purpose of the wedding ceremony?  How does the officiant answer this question?   A religious ceremony held in a church, is often considered a worship service and therefore done by pastors, priests, etc.  As times have changed, and more ceremonies are held in other non-church locations,  the idea of the worship service has relaxed a bit.  However,  if you are interested in a religious ceremony in a church or non-church location,   I would suggest that you seek out an officiant who has some worship experience and religious training.  These officiants, pastors, ministers and priests are usually accountable not only to a local congregation, but to a higher governing body.

On the other hand, if you have little religious belief and really havent been a practicing Christian,  a civil ceremony is probably a better option for you.  A civil ceremony can include whatever is meaningful to you and performed by a judge, pastor, minister, a justice of the peace and those who receive their “ordinations” online.  These ceremonies usually have little mention of God, if any.

I have performed civil ceremonies over the years because the state gives me this responsibility.   I try to create a ceremony that is meaningful to each couple,  sometimes there is mention of God, sometimes not.

Remember, those who have received their ordinations online, have little training.  Some states are not accepting that type of ordination.  Check with your local clerk of court.

3.  Is the officiant open to you writing your own vows, or does he or she offer some different vow options?  Most couples choose one of the numerous options I provide.  You are welcome to write your own vows, as long as the vows end with,  “as long as we both shall live.”    I would not marry a couple that makes promises on a temporary basis, or only as long they are in love or on fire with passion.   The vows must indicate a permanence.

4.  Does the officiant have restrictions when it comes to wedding location?  Unless this involves some extreme sport, most officiants are flexible.  However,  if there is significant travel,  you will incur more fees.

5.  Discuss with your potential wedding officiant, the fees and cost to perform the ceremony & rehearsal.  It is common to make a deposit to reserve the date, and the rest is usually due no later than the day before the wedding.

Happy Hunting for your wedding officiant!  If you would like to discuss my availability, qualifications or experience,  see (About),  or please send email to Joy or fill out the Contact Form.